MacGyver Workout 1.0

The fucking Y closed at 6:00 today, which is definitely not how I remember their weekend schedule. Where will all the juiced-up locals go now? I could care less, but what was important is that I have missed shoulders and back way too many times. Unfortunately for me, the fucking Y was closed. Not to be denied, and bored out of my mind, I decided to make a project of it. This photo essay encapsulates my mission this evening, and may be admissible as evidence of my slow descent into madness back here in Durham, CT.

Our basement is divided into two parts. The "clean," finished half of it and the unfinished "dirty" side of it:
As you can see, my house offers a cornucopia of heavy things and other implements that might facilitate a workout. Here are some of the things I came up with. First, the mid and front deltoids. Things needed: paint cans.
Well that worked out well, but it wasn't too creative. Next stop: Trap City. Things found:

Cinder Blocks.
Closet rod.
Then voila, shrugging apparatus. Four sets of fifteen did it, since I was not confident that I could fit any more cinder blocks on the closet rod.
On to reverse bench. This isn't something I usually do, since I usually do some kind of reverse fly on a machine. Of course... how can I do reverse bench without a bench? And without traditional weights. Solution involves:

Picnic cooler.
Spare provisions.
Table.
Bam. Problem solved. Four sets of fifteen, like the shrugs, since it wasn't a lot of weight and I couldn't fit any more cans in the cooler.
Next I figured I'd try reverse pushups, something else I don't do but I've seen people do. Materials:

Cinder blocks.
Closet rod.
Old chairs straight off the Law & Order set, or straight out of a 1960s-era supersecret government compound. Or maybe just from my basement, who knows...
I did a few sets of 20. Didn't feel like it did much, as I had to try really hard not to engage my abs at all. Anyhow, I made a valiant effort.
Having not gotten much out of that, it was on to upright rows, one of my personal favorites. Went back to my old friends the cinder blocks and just rowed one of them. Egad! This cinder is all scratchety and unpleasant.
Solution: heteroflexible garden gloves.
Much better. Three sets of ten was actually somewhat of a challenge even if the weight was not as much as I usually do on the Universal machine at the Y.
Next up was some standard kneeling rows... but what has a good handle and is small (and heavy) enough to use for this most simple of exercises? Solution found:

Dad's toolbox.
Some extra weight.
Der UberKouch, missing two legs and bought from the Bargain Cave at Bob's Discount Furniture.
Well now I realized I was just making shit up for the sake of doing crazy things. Figured I'd cap off my workout with some military press. Using the cinder blocks would have been too much weight, and even if I had put the paint cans on the bar, they would have slid off and made this small evening project into a much longer cleanup project. Solution:

Rolled up carpet.
Ancient kitchen chair.
Rolled-up carpetpress.

I would call my MacGyver Workout V.1.0 a great success. And I have amused myself for much longer by writing this post and taking the pictures, so this has helped with the whole keeping-myself-busy situation, too.

I hope you've enjoyed this journey into the brain-numbing boredom that is my parents' house. Happy New Year, all.