Skateboards... so 1994.

Today walking to the gym, I saw these two girls awkwardly skateboarding down the street. It seriously looked like a slight gust of wind would send these girls crashing into the street like a newspaper repository in the path of an angry Shuffles. I slowed down to witness what I believed to be the inevitable, but no dice.

Increasingly around campus I've seen a resurgence of skateboards as a means of transportation. It seems to me though, that skateboards are the least logical choice you could make (short of riding a horse or burro to class) in an urban environment. Or any environment for that matter, except the local library parking lot.

First of all, it seems that riding a skateboard to class requires only slightly less then pushing yourself along perched on the back of a shopping cart. And might I add that a shopping cart has more storage space, and you can lock a shopping cart to a rail or tree if need be. Not so with a skateboard.

Secondly, you're not even going that much faster. At a brisk jog, I can run faster than a skateboard (provided it is not going down a hill). So unless you need to strengthen one of your legs versus the other, I suggest running instead.

Finally, you're not in sixth grade anymore. Put away the Alf pogs, give the sweatpants to Goodwill, realize that you've been growing hair in odd places for some time now, and ditch the skateboard. You are no longer a pre-pubescent rebel looking to be one of the "crazy kids" that the crazy old guy yells at for doing Ollies in the Elks Lodge parking lot.